Top 10 Ways to Get A White NBA Player…. For Black Women!

 

VLUU L210  / Samsung L210

 

 10. Know which tall white guys are actually NBA players. You can never assume just because the guy is over 6’2” he making millions. (Sorry to bring attention to you guys that have been using your height as a booty magnet)

 9. Find out where your local white ball player frequents. They typically have their favorite spots in to hang on their home turf. If you like one that will be visiting your town find out where the black ball players hang. Guaranteed you’ll find a white slang throwing baller with them. (White ball players hang with the black ones. There’s no racism in basketball. Well unless you are one of the two with the initials of D.S)

 8. Learn Serbian, Turkish, German or Spanish as only 21% of NBA players are white and somewhere around 15 of them are actually from America. That said, be willing to shut your mouth and make a damn sandwich when he asks.

7. Straighten the sam hell out of your hair, use whatever chemical needed. Whether it be lye, Thioglycolic Acid or ammonia leave it on as long as you can. So, you’ll suffer a few blisters and scabs on the scalp, nobody will see those, they’ll just see the beautiful flowing hair. Note; if your hair isn’t down to your mid waist… GET A WEAVE!

6. Let him know that you’re okay with infidelity! I mean unless you plan to pull a Jackie Christie, hit all of the away games and put the smack down on any woman giving your man the goo-goo eyes, including his mama, be prepared to live a life in denial. Who am I kidding? Be prepared to live 10 years in denial, scream “CHEATER”, file for divorce and then take half.

5. Learn to be the best stalker ever. “Oh, that’s funny I’m running in to you again. Hehe! Must be fate” *Show big beautifully veneered smile.

4. Be a skinny and in shape broad! Get fat AFTER the ring!! *Only jumpoffs are allowed to be “thick”.

3. Make sure your boobs are big, round and firm! If you don’t have em’, buy em’!

2. Don’t go in the sun! Stay as light as possible. As a matter of fact go catch Vitiligo, it’ll better your chances.

1. Read my book for a step by step guide to dating white men.

 

In all honesty, it is rare for the white men in the NBA to marry a black woman. Mostly because many stem from other countries and end up marrying someone from their home turf or someone that resembles that. Shout out to Jessica Olsson and Dirk Nowitzki on their recent engagement. I’m glad he gave sistas another chance after that first con artist wreck that he was engaged to. Good luck to you both!

 

 

 

 

 

9 thoughts on “Top 10 Ways to Get A White NBA Player…. For Black Women!

  1. This web site is so full of common sense that I would like to add my 2cents. I have dated BW for most of my life. Talk and be nice to her and above all be yourself. If she likes you she will give you hints. Do not play games, maintain your dignity and hers. Put her at ease by going to a movie and having a small snack after the show. Develop small talk. No politics. I am a conservative because I believe in freedom but I emphasize the positive points of freedom. If she sees that you are genuine and truthful with you beliefs she will be tolerate what you have to say. If not, you and her must agree to be to be short on the volatile issues, like abortion. However, I have convinced several women that abortion is cutting the population of black people down. She might overlook that issue. She will ask questions about party affiliation and I have persuade some and lost some. Be intelligent enough to recognize what issues are important to her.
    If , after a year, you are still dating the same BW, marry her and have a family. I have learned that long term human relationships are extremely important !!

  2. I just read you’re 10 ways to get a white nba player and I started reading it and then started to get a little upset. I felt as if you were telling us not to be ourselves as black women. You say not to get any darker, so that means if I’m dark skinned (which I am) then I’m just shit outta luck. If my hair isn’t incredibly long, which most average American Black girls don’t have, then buy a weave. Also straighten the hell outta my hair until it flows as beautiful as a White woman’s. This is the complex that I don’t think a lot of Black women should be hearing, because it’s one we deal with all our lives. I call it The Bluest Eye Complex, and when we’re told to become white in order to have this, that, or the other it pretty much tells us to lose our identity as black women. It tells us to become someone else, and only pull out black bits when it’s convenient. That seems a little ridiculous and hurtful to me.

  3. I think that it is a bit harsh to imply that a Black woman has to stay as ‘light as possible’ in order to get a White man. If she is naturally light already and that happens to attract the eyes of a White man, that’s fine. However, I think that the key to attract the eyes of a White man or any other race of man outside of your own race is to be unique and to be yourself. If that means having curly hair, try to have the most beautiful curly hair imaginable. If that means having darker skin, try to have the most beautiful dark skin. If that means being thicker, try to be toned and dress well (and be healthy). Being the most natural beauty attracts the men.

    Besides, I wouldn’t want to wear weave to attract a man or pretend to have lighter skin, etc. only for him to find out the truth on the wedding night. Anything that he needs to know about me needs to come out on the first date. Then, we can know if we should continue to date and marry or move on due to major differences.

    • Amen! A lot of white men are shocked on the wedding night. Fake hair, fake boobs and contacts! Keep it real ladies! I’m not picture perfect and my white man LOVES me just the way I am!!

  4. Wow!!! What a harsh piece of writing! I guess if you are not light, bright, damn near white, with a perfect body and long flowing hair wbite men are not for you! I’m glad that we have real white men out there who love real sisters! WE wonder why we catch so much HELL as a race!! It’s MESS like this that keeps the confusion going!

  5. As a black woman who has had quite a few LTRs with White men and am currently in one that is in year 7; this is total and complete BS!!! Black women, don’t listen to this self-hating moron. Any White man who is worth being with will accept and love you for who you are.

  6. LOL. This is obviously a Tongue In Cheek article & was hilarious. I actually knew a white, married (& now divorced) NBA stalker who, sadly enuf, was trying to get a black NBA player. I am a white male who has had many Wonderful relationships with black or mulatto women & was madly in love with 2 of these Beautiful ladies (sometimes things just don’t work out). Thank you for your insightful videos & articles! Guys, Just Be Yourself! Have confidence in yourselves & go for it. The qualities you have as a man will be attractive to women of all races as we are One race = Human & deep down we All want the Same things :) Good Luck! You may find the love of your life or simply a new friend & Who can’t use more of those ? Namaste’

  7. Decent advice except for the last.

    White men prefer slimmer, DARK skin, attractive women. The wealthiest white men in the world who end up seriously dating or marrying black women– the women are attractive (have great features), in shape, and are DARKSKIN. They are chocolate.

    I repeat as far as looks go for dating a wealthy white man. Be dark skin, slim and fit, and definitely have on that push up bra to pronounce the ladies.

    Now the hair thing just depends on the type of white guy, but the “safe” way is to wear a straight attractive weave (or real hair) as this can add a comfort factor. And in the meantime just work on growing out your own hair, or have an attractive short hair style underneath.

    I just got hit on and got the digits of a white NBA player. He was in my city and we happened to chat it up while at a restaurant. He and his coach were both hitting on me.

    I lost alot of weight recently and got in shape and the amount of quality white men that hit on me has progressed ALOT. One thing that is fact is white men love a slim chocolate big-boobed woman. And if you’re educated and well spoken and classy then you can become wifey pretty quick.

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